February 2012
5 posts
auction
http://minneapolis.craigslist.org/ram/spo/2870722201.html
one more great auction:
http://minneapolis.craigslist.org/wsh/msg/2870646665.html
another cool auction
http://minneapolis.craigslist.org/hnp/hsh/2870534153.html
Things to do with your new Father-in-law:
ever wonder about the day that you will have to hang out with your other dad? me too, but don’t sweat it man. here’s a list of things to do:
Hot bread sculpture class
Porch construction
Lean Cuisine history online tour (from your home computer)
lunch with your real dad
Holiday Inn
Reenact Saving Private Ryan
Grunting contest
Catch
Install Windows ‘98 together
Recite the...
cool auction
http://minneapolis.craigslist.org/hnp/spo/2870087360.html
November 2011
4 posts
Regular Movie Idea:
Re-make Good Will Hunting inside of a Godfathers Pizza.
Matt Damon (Will) will be played by a Toyota Tacoma.
Robin Williams (Sean) will be played by Robin Williams but dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire.
Minnie Driver (Skylar) will be played by a small golf club.
Ben Affleck (Chuckie) will be played by retired 6 time Pro Bowl half-back Jerome Bettis.
Every other character will be the same as...
Hahaha:
Just signed my dog up for a crocheting class he will never pass.
Food for Thought:
What if Doctors were made out of grass.
Doctors who may exist, but i haven't looked into...
Dr. Terry Growthsmart - baby scientist
Dr. Ben Demon - General Practitioner
Dr. Gun Knife -exercise doctor
Dr. Fill Dentist - psychologist
Dr. Phd Grapes - nutritionist
Dr. Neil Testosteroid - illegal steroid doctor for baseball players.
Dr. Michael M. Heroin - ear, nose, and throat doctor
Dr. WR - wide receiver doctor
see also:
Dr. Alfonso Deerskin- cool ranch doritos
Dr. Larry...
May 2011
1 post
pizza surgery strategy
this spam was uncannily apropos to co-author and compatriot’s current knee / pizza condition:
Hello. Am Paul Cole by name and am hearing impaired Okay do you have 14 inches pepperoni pizzas and how much is it per order also do you accept credit card and what’s your name,I Want to make an order for 100 large pepperoni anyone you are capable (14 inches) pizzas with Pepperoni toppings...
April 2011
18 posts
Invent your own sculpture garden! heres how: Take...
I watched this kid today try to steal money from...
you guys constantly tired of hearing "in this...
is your job as a bank teller getting old? fill...
out of beer? pARTY dying down!? crush up some...
also, cocaine swallowing contest.
Banking advicing!
Walk into your wells fargo and demand to open a joint checking account with a pile of hamsters. get ATM cards for all of them, even the dead ones. and some golf themed checks. cite the 3rd amendment repeatedly.
also demand the currency be eggo waffles$$$. that should help out*
call me for more
hamsters waffles bank ideas
*hey
Everyone's an artist!: shit-ideez for ur next...
sculpturing a deodorant raccoon. owww!
crucifiction of jesus christ on your refrigerator, but really crucify someone on your refrigerator doesn’t matter who it could be your neighbor doesn’t actually have to be jesus christ
huge painting of dicks
pork collage, old.
you could wear a condom all the time.
Another angle: instead of conventional weapons and...
Entering your parents elderly cat in AA and/or the...
Is your quesadilla a little thin? Not enough...
Having sex with your dog's kong chew toy
alphabetizing
everything in your pantry
the book you own
todd/dog
your partial birth abortions
milk
almost
Oprah WInfrey
dust or something elser eally hard to ;unerstandings3!!
chewing through the drywall
roadmap to prosperity
hey man you ever feel like it’s just not gonna happen for you? well stop being like that with your thinking. couple starter ideas for you guys out there having a tough economic time.
- invent an scraping device to get all that taco off the dog’s hair
- don’t go to jail cuz its too expensive rt now just ask my cousin Cody he’s just got out of jail and is broke as fuck!
-...
New idea for a baby:
got a new baby? here’s some good ideas about what to do for/with it:
Mcdonald’s ball-pit overnight trip
Volunteering at radioshack
Formula made of syrup
Formula one car race
Hard shell tacos
Astro-turf crib
Reading
Have you ever thought about just going outside and...
Shitty Breakfast Cereals **about to hit the...
1. Kellogs Skin Flakes
2. Honey-nut Ramadan©
3. Feed Corn + Wasps™
4. General Mills Television Cracklin’ Bits
5. Honey-bunches of Styrofoam/Blood™
6. Dale Earnheart Tire and Grave Cereals✓
7. eMail Mixxy Stirrers® with Go-gurt frosters $$$$
8. bowwls of AIR™
9. ExpensiveEEyep☎callme
10. Internoil Ruvenue Tax Oatmeal eatign©
November 2010
5 posts
Are you busy at work? No place to eat your nachos?...
Covering your dog in oatmeal and sending it to a...
Putting sunglasses on your pet raccoon and...
New snack idea: Doritos made of glass
5 new industries
that may change the face of business as we know it and throw everything you thought you knew about technology out the window. forever. trending right now:
1. online funerals - it’s not your grandpa’s funeral anymore, but it is.
2. vodka computers - kinda like it sounds.
3. dog NBAs - dogs are learning to be better and better in the post, and on the perimeter.
4. frozen - could be...
August 2010
4 posts
new pharmaceutical's
Dog Viagra
July 2010
1 post
New flavours
salmon/grenadine blizzurd
grilled asparagus/cool ranch dorito frosty
Lint/dead skin cotton candy
May 2010
2 posts
New car models
the Honda Touch-Hole
the Pontiac Jazz Musician
the Ford Crinkle
the Hyundai Chance
the Toyota Cookie
the Volkswagon Toyoda
Frenching your cat,
then eating a bail of moldy hay.
April 2010
6 posts
feeding your dog
Trading up in the first round of the NFL draft
to select Dave Thomas’ corpse at Right Guard, even though his time in the 40 was a little worse than average.
Calling the cops on your neighbors for having a...
top *shitty* diet ideas of the week:
1 only eat hamster mulch until your 6th birthday. it worked for dan marino!
2 have “a couple” orders of crab rangoon before your next tae-bo sesh! your girlfriend will thank you!
3 replace all those trans-fats with some healthy dirt / onion peels / yeast packets. a light substitute that is good for the heart and prevents unwanted pregnancy.
4 saying the lord’s prayer 50...
Ever wonder why your garden sucks? For starters...
March 2010
1 post
A Real Doctor
get rid of all doctors. the only doctor left in the world lives in cadott, wi. his name is dr. larry penis alfonso deerskin. he can only treat syphilis and broken ribs and takes payment in bags of cool ranch doritos.
February 2010
4 posts
Pro Move
Lacing up your new Jordans with overcooked fettuccini
and trying to “guard” people walking by your house.
Plantalones
Pants for plants
Thanks to drew for the tip